Thursday, March 18, 2010
She's Spinning, She's Spinning!
"She" in the title is me.
When I was a little girl, I used to spin really quickly in a circle just to achieve that sweet dizzy feeling that made the world stumble with you and shift down to your level. I did this in the house, outside of our house, and out on the busy sidewalks with my parents.
"She's spinning, she's spinning!" My Dad would exclaim, and for years after, this became one of his favorite ways to describe me as I grew momentarily disoriented from the constant turn, turn, turn of my revolution.
On Tuesday evening, it was time to get Disoriented again. Senior Disorientation was held at Bogart's restaurant which is basically a dinner for the senior class of 2010 filled with lectures about life post grad from alumni. A life more ordinary and less extraordinary from the way the speakers presented it.
There was a breakdown about bills that was extremely unrealistic (apts. were right on, but I've already begun paying my student loan back and it is in no way less than $150 a month), discussions about health care plans, and that we should begin socking away two grand a month for retirement. Never mind that most people really cannot do that on a beginner's salary and if you want to have kids that grows even more difficult.
Also...resumes are looked at for a total of 30 seconds, and every job you apply for has at least 1000 other people applying for the same position. You should never date a guy under 26 because they are apparently gold diggers (while I highly wonder where they picked up that sort of factoid, I believe it), and your friends will no longer live right next door to you!!! Yes, they included 3 exclamation points.
As an aside, a woman who lectures on the art of dressing professionally ought to do so for such a dinner, don't you think? One of the speakers was not well dressed for the occasion at all, the one who rattled on about suits and ties and skirts.
You know how this made me feel?
I wanted to jump out of my chair, abandon the truly terrible pasta, and run for it.
Seriously. In order not to fall down the morose hole, I joked with my girlfriends at the table about anything I could to avoid feeling depressed. Eventually though, I did something better and just tuned the speakers out (not hard at all to do, the sound quality was terrible).
I don't like to be talked down to and will not tolerate having anyone tell me how my life is supposed to feel, to be, how I should act in society. When I defy these thoughts, with a joke or express the way I really feel, some people tend to look at me almost sympathetically or worse, contempt.
"Oh Heather. She truly lives with her head in the clouds." is the sympathetic response.
"God, I hate it when Heather starts running her mouth on life. She clearly has no idea what the real world is like. I know. I've been there. She's just a spoiled girl who doesn't understand. Maybe when things don't work out for her and when people hurt her enough, she'll get it through her skull once and for all." is the contempt.
I'm okay with these thoughts because I do know people have them about me. I even think them about myself sometimes, but deep down, I know things will be okay.
Here's how I would have run the show if I had any say in any event like this.
Disorientation is an ugly name to refer to "growing up" as. I hate the name and in my eyes, that is the first thing about the event that needs to go away. Throw it out and never, EVER, refer to life as being disoriented.
We are all spinning right now, and in our lives, this spinning is working just great with the right mix of friends, family, homework, and social life. In a few months, we will stay spinning, but in another direction with the world shifting in another way. Just because we're growing up doesn't mean we're losing everything!
Class of 2010, my loves, it has been an infinitely long journey that has stopped and started again in all sorts of ways. I want everyone to know that right now, right in this moment, we have everything to gain, and everything is possible.
Once we stop spinning, the world will be shaky, but after a deep breath (or two), things will realign themselves and will work out for the best.
Just be yourself and do what you makes you feel happy. I emphasize the words "happy" and "feel" because they go hand in hand. You want to pursue all of the things in life that thrill you, motivate and drive you. When you feel so strongly about what you are passionate about, everyone will be able to tell. And you will be happy! Don't work hard at something that will take you on a miserable journey to achieve. Do what you enjoy and all the world will spin you in the right way.
Oh, and as far as job interview apparel tips go, just make sure to get your suit tailored, be able to walk confidently in your heels, and ask your interviewer lots of questions. I don't know about you, but I'm far more fascinated in the lives of others than just little old me.
Come on baby we ain't gonna live forever
Let me show you all the things that we could do
-4eva, The Veronicas
Love to you all,