Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Being Grand



When you look back on your childhood, it all seems so simple and uncomplicated. That is precisely how it was for me.

As a little girl, I attended a private school that did not officially embrace a uniform policy until the sixth grade. Until then, my brother and I were notorious for being the best dressed children there. I had a closet filled with frilly dresses, shorts, shirts, blouses, jeans with sparkles, fancy shoes. Mom put ribbons in my hair in pinks and lavenders and mint greens, some of my favorite colors back then.

I spent most evenings as a child and later as a teenager at the department store Dillards where my Dad worked part-time. It was like being Eloise at the Plaza for me. Everyone working there knew my brother and me and each evening, we raced through the men’s dress shirts, ties, suits, and underwear aisles to get to my Dad’s department, men’s shoes. We played in the stockroom there, careful not to knock the shoe boxes over. I loved to talk to his coworker David, with his winning British accent, and his boss Ann, the tallest, most blond beauty girl I have ever met (really, ever). Don, in the suits department, who was brilliantly handsome and made me smile just like my Dad, and dear, sweet Kathy who made sure I always had the prettiest shoes to wear that fit my actual size.



Then, with my Mom and Earl, I’d go to other floors of the store and try on hats in the women’s hats and gloves section. Sit underneath the gowns in the petites department and collect the sequins that fell off in paper drinking cups. Try on red patent heels and slowly totter down the fragrance aisle and back up again. Sit on a display bed and pretend that I could really sleep there for the night. By 9:30pm, we would all be in the car driving back home, my Dad, Mom, Earl, and I. We would stop for ice cream cones and arrive back a little after 10pm where I did all of my homework in a hurry before going to sleep.

Dillards was my second home. I could walk in that store and travel throughout the adjoining mall blindfolded and never once get lost. Walking around each evening with my clothes scented like Givenchy and giggling with my brother as we raced up the escalators together. Sometimes I sat down on the escalator step and saw that world, so up high, so brimming with life and the happy tunes of a piano playing in the background.



When I close my eyes, it’s like I’m seven again. The feelings are all the same, I’m still there, running, and trying everything on, and people are still smiling and being grand. There is no sadness, no fury, no loneliness or fear of the future. Just all of these kind souls embracing the day in a way I haven’t seen since.

A spell was cast to change everything. I began to get angry in the store and act rude in public. My Dad quit his job there. Dillards as a whole closed down due to lack of business as did the rest of that mall. The spell was broken when I turned 18 and I woke up. And I cried, because that place of wonder was no longer a part of my life.



15 years have gone by, but if I close my eyes tight enough, and just concentrate long enough, I see the bright lights reflecting upon my Mom’s auburn hair, the glass display bottles of perfume, the carefully arranged blue ties on the table, and a little girl with curled brown hair racing down to her Dad, laughing freely and fully the entire way.

Love to you all,
Heather

15 comments:

Rosie Savage said...

This is a beautiful memory.
One of my favourite childhood films was A Little Princess as well.

http://www.bittenfingernails.blogspot.com

Jaime @ laviejaime said...

This is a really sweet post.

Ms. B @ Millie Deel said...

What lovely memories!! There was a fabric store that my mother used to take me to that had been there forever and still carried deadstock fabric from the 50s and 60s. There were sequins EVERYWHERE all over the floor. I remember traipsing along behind her, picking up all of the sequins off of the floor as we walked through the store.

Sadako said...

Ah, great memories. I love taking that proverbial trip down Memory Lane...you did it beautifully here!

Natalie said...

I always wished I could be like Eloise at the Plaza :D I wish I'd been excellently dressed as a kid, but I just wore boys' clothes from WalMart hahaha. Oh, and British accents are amazing... What wonderful memories you have as a child!

English Rose ♥ said...

Heather this was so so so incredibly beautifully written.

Stunningly expressed memory, you have such a way with words

Merci beaucoup for the lovely comment darling =]

Stay safe and chic ma chérie,
English Rose x
http://iamanenglishrose.blogspot.com

drollgirl said...

what a magical time you must have had there! i am so sorry that it ended, but maybe something equally fabulous will happen in your future. or the future of your kids. :)

little luxury list said...

Heather what a lovely memory! You have a lifetime to build other great memories as well too and I wish you the most fabulous ones!

Unknown said...

I was always glad I didn't have to wear a uniform to school.

Anonymous said...

You are such a strong writer. This is excellent.

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Anonymous said...

nice post

Propoquerian said...

The sad reality--one needs a lot of money to be surrounded by such luxury. Sitting in motel 6's with my friends, I miss the Ritz Carltons my dad used to take my sister to and order craazy amounts of room service for us in. The great reality--heather, you work damn hard. you will have enough money to once again find yourself in beautiful, beautiful scenes that you brought so to life in this post. I think we all sighed for a moment :)

the girl in grey said...

God, that ending really bites. I feel the same way about my childhood though. When did we grow up? How did that happen?
XO THE GIRL IN GREY

BonBon Rose Girls Kristin said...

It's amazing how in an instant you can be taken back to a childhood memory. Thing were so simple then...or so we thought.